Bringing home a new baby is one of life’s most amazing experiences, one you have always dreamt of. Once that little nugget is home from the hospital there is no going back! Today I thought I would share my settling/sleeping experience with my three newborn’s and tricks that I have learn both the easy and hard way that worked for us.
What you need to know. There are a few things you need to know first, your little squishy newborn has no idea what the hell just happened, why it’s so bright and noisy all of a sudden and why the hell is everyone passing me around every time I make a noise! So with that in mind make some rules for the little nugget from day 1 and be strict. Don’t be upset when your baby cries, when you cry or a child cries it means something is wrong. However with a baby it doesn’t always mean something is wrong, it means it is the only noise he has figured out and is going to use it for hunger, tiredness, hot, cold, wees, poohs, doesn’t like the channel you are watching, sometimes babies just cry.
Babies are fast learners. They have to be otherwise they wouldn’t be able to figure out what the hell to do. From day 1 you are beginning habits that your baby will associate with sleep so every time I would find myself doing something I would ask myself, is this going to start a bad habit? For example driving them around the block to get them to sleep, yes it worked tonight but do you want to be doing that every night for a month? Rocking them to sleep, yes it worked this morning but can I do that every time? Letting them sleep in your bed, worked this afternoon but will I ever get any sleep again? Even a dummy can become a bad habit. Make sure your baby is only using the dummy to settle not for comfort all day, or make sure it’s in his mouth because he actually needs it not because you want him to stop making that noise.
Sleep. Babies need sleep, lots of sleep, it is when they are asleep that they grow, so you can see why they need so much of it. Never have your newborn up and awake for more than 1 hour. After an hour put him to bed, even if he doesn’t look tired he is. Don’t wait until he is crying and telling you he is tired, pre-empt it. He will sleep for a few hours then it’s the next feed. Repeat all day long!
Day One Baby Sleeping Rules. Make two spots in the house that are baby’s spots, have this ready even before you bring them home. One is his day spot and one is his sleeping spot.
A Day Spot: My newborns have all started out life in the same Winnie The Pooh rocker. I find a safe spot in the main living area and that’s where they hang out when awake during the day. That way it becomes a familiar spot and familiar is safe. It’s bright, it’s noisey, where he’s on display for siblings and visitors and he gets to learn what day time is all about.
A Sleeping Spot: I have made an effort as soon as we got home from hospital with all three to put them straight in to their cot for sleep time. In a dark room, with music playing. I would listen to the CD of choice in the car for the last half of the pregnancy so it would be a familiar sound. Every time bubs goes to bed the CD is started, the lights off and door shut. This triggers hearing and sight senses teaching him it’s bed time kiddo. The great thing about the CD is it can be used in the car, once baby recognises the music means sleep time, he will become a great sleeping on car trips. When Mr Chilled would cry in the car Master 7 would say “Mum put the sleeping song on” and he would fall asleep within minutes.
Noise. Do not try and be quiet in the house, babies can and should sleep through anything, keep the TV on let the kids go nuts, bubs will get use to it. He will also get used to a very quiet house, so when a noise does arrive he will be woken up by a phone or doorbell! Annoying!
Wrapping. Wrapping newborns is the best method it’s like it mimics being snug, tight and warm back in your belly. I’ve had two summer babies and a winter baby and all were wrapped as tight as I could to stop their startle reflex waking them up. Summer babies can go to bed in only a nappy wrapped up in a light muslin cloth wrap. If your baby is too hot, don’t worry he will cry and let you know. Wrap tight for a good night!
Baby’s Ques. You need to try and learn baby’s ques. With Mr Chilled 1, I soon learnt if he was tired he would cry with no tears but if he cried with tears meant he was hungry and needed to be fed. Watch for signs of tiredness, rubbing face, getting shitty, making fists was a clue with all my 3, pre-empt this strike and get them in to bed before it becomes a cry fest. Really try and tune in to the little guy as he will show you want he wants with his body language and cries you are just usually too tired to notice.
Day Vs Night. I can guarantee you when you bring bubs home he is asleep all day and up all night. So when you are super tired 9pm onwards he is awake and ready to roll. If you treat night and day differently he will soon catch on. At night feeds, do not make eye contact and do not talk to him. This is a working visa only, you aren’t there to socialise! Don’t even change their nappy at night, it just wakes them up too much, and do not turn the TV on, just dark quiet sleepy baby and sleepy mummy. Baby up, boob out/bottle out, baby fed, baby back to bed. A daytime feed can be as social as you like, this is teaching him that night is a quick feed in a dark room and back to sleep but day is one big party!
Settling. Settling is the part before they fall asleep, this is where habits are formed. Take bubs in to their sleeping spot, make it dark, music on, and hold them close. If you have to pat their back do it to the beat of a heart, this always works. Once they have settled put them down, keep patting to the beat of your heart just to seal the deal. Once down, walk away, shut the door. They are asleep, they are safe and they are fine. If you go back open that door to check, you will wake them up and be back to square one!
Important points to remember, make a day spot, and a night spot, make day feeding and night feeding totally different, don’t let your tired self start bad habits and try and establish a feeding and sleeping routine ASAP this way you and your new baby will be SO much happier. If your gut says their is something not quite right with bubs then trust yourself and get help, you are the expert on your baby even though right now you don’t feel like it, you are the expert.
Come back tomorrow for Pt 2 of Getting Your Baby To Settle – Routine.
I am more than happy to answer any questions you have about settling your little squirt, hit the email link below and unleash all your thoughts!
Renee
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